I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to blog about this book series. Well, of course I can blog about it. What I was concerned about was if I was going to be able to blog about it tactfully. But I thought since everyone in the free world is reading and talking openly about it, I might as well too, right? The series is a trilogy and I have read all three so I will review them together as one big book which is really what they technically are.
50 Shades of Grey is officially labeled a “romance”. That’s the section I was directed to when looking for it at Barnes & Noble – a section, if I’m completely honest, I don’t think I had ever been in before. Foreign territory. But let’s get right down to it, shall we. This is porn, pure and simple. I’m not saying that’s bad. And yes, it is romantic too. But it’s porn. Now, I’m not sure if all “romance” novels are pornish. Like I said, this was my first. Maybe the rest of you book nerds can enlighten me.
But there I was in the “romance” section searching for this book and it was sold out. Apparently it’s sold out all over the greater metro area forcing me to download it to my Nook. Which turned out to be a good thing since after reading it, I’m not sure I would want to be seen in public buying it or reading it. There’s a reason a local female radio host turned scarlet red and made me promise not to think of her as a pervert when I saw her at a restaurant and told her I was buying the book because she had been talking about it on her radio show.
OK, so here’s the story. It’s really a fairy tale as old as time: awkward girl meets handsome, rich boy. Boy pursues girl. Boy turns out to be into dominant/submissive sex play and asks girl to sign a contract so he can tie her up, spank her and torture her with various instruments in his extensively appointed medieval sex chamber. Boy and girl live happily ever after. The end.
Oh, I’m sorry. Is that not how most little girl’s romantic dreams go?
It definitely isn’t how awkward, bookish, soon-to-be college graduate Anastasia Steele imagined her Mr. Right. Until she meets Christian Grey. Christian is an insanely gorgeous billionaire and the most eligible bachelor in the Pacific Northwest. However, he sees something in Anastasia and begins pursuing her, much to Ana’s bewilderment. And Ana is drawn to Christian too. It’s magnetic. But Christian, despite his success, his good looks and his charm, has a deep dark obsession that I so unceremoniously spoiled above.
Book one is really just a built up. Will Ana sign the contract and agree to be Christian’s sub or will she be able to draw Christian out of his damaged shell into a real relationship? And James uses book one to set the scene, sex wise. It’s shocking at first, the detail and graphicness of the sex scenes. There is a LOT of sex - kinky, kinky, sometimes quite violent sex. One friend, when describing the book, said she thought she would never hear herself say it but she found herself getting tired of all the sex. I have to agree.
However, books two and three delve a little deeper into Christian’s and Ana’s relationship. The sex lost a little of its novelty and naughtiness and I found myself wanting to get on with the plot instead of the naughty bits. James obliges somewhat.
The story attempts to be a modern day Jane Eyre, which, as one of my absolute favorites; one that I have read repeatedly since I was 12, it falls quite flat. The rich yet damaged man with a deep dark secret falls for the penniless, virtuous, simple maiden. Although instead of an insane wife in the attic like Rochester, Grey has a depraved, sadistic streak that makes him want to beat then bed young women who look like his birth mother.
Despite its porniness (have I said “porn” enough?), I was quite surprised at how well written it was. For porn. Yes, a lot of the dialogue is quite cheesy, especially the sexy time talk. There is a lot of “oh baby” and “let me hear you baby” and “you belong to me baby”. There are a lot of sexy, smoldering stares, fists in the hair and long, passionate, deep, demanding kisses. In truth, I think James copied and pasted the first sex scene and then added various kinky situations and accoutrements for each subsequent sex scene. But, once again, it is what it is and it could have been a whole lot worse.
Apart from all the porntasticness, there is a plot and it’s quite engaging. The romantic parts are hug-yourself-and-grin romantic, the sexy parts are hot and sexy and the funny parts are laugh-out-loud hilarious. It’s a fun, fast read – perfect for the pool or beach this summer. That is if you want to be seen in public reading it. But like I said, everyone is reading it so if you want to be like all the cool kids and be up on the latest popular book discussion, you’ll want to pick this one up. Or safely and privately download it (and the following two in the trilogy) to your Nook like I did. I’m giving it four bows. But I want to qualify that rating. I gauge my ratings on a few different factors – writing quality, cohesiveness, plot and storyline, character likability, etc. This isn’t a Pulitzer Prize winning literary masterpiece. But I couldn’t put it down and that says a lot.
Let me know what you thought of 50 Shades of Grey. And let me know how many strangers have accosted you and started talking to you about the book, and by extension, their own personal sex life. Because that’s actually happened to me quite a lot in the last week or two. Much to my dismay. Until next time, happy reading!
